It is hard to imagine that a weed, some advice and cup of tea could lead to expenses in excess of $150. Add Lilo to the scene and it becomes a lot easier.

It all began with a weed - Kikuyu to be precise. In fact it was turbo charged monster Kikuyu which had established itself in the dead centre of the lawn.

A visiting garden handyman saw the patch and being a man of few words advised:

"Dig it all out.€

So I did. A long and painstaking job it was.

Next day at dawn, Lilo came trotting happily into the bedroom. I greeted her, when suddenly she had a brain wave. A vertical take-off onto the bed. The mug of tea I was holding shot its contents all over me and the duvet.

Lilo, who had never done that before (the bed is definitely off limits), looked terrified and did not know what to do next. She stood rooted to the spot, I couldn't move as I was pinned in a dog vs human impasse.  Eventually her catatonic state came to an end and in a jumble of skinny legs she executed an aerial take-off.

Then I saw the bed! It was covered in mud and tea. A sort of slurry. I got up in disbelief and looked out of the window - there was the answer:

The Black Angel had been out in the dawn and continued my weeding work. She had drilled down to leg length, created a bunker and fired the excavations over most of the lawn. Any remaining Kikuyu was on the neighbour's roof.

Later that day I raked back the soil, but the area resembled a sink hole. Put in an order for top soil and covered the sink hole with netting.

Lilo got fed up and dug another hole, this time in a secret location behind a bush. I had never seen the foundations of my house before this event. I have to say that there is not much between oneself and the devil below.

The handyman came back with the top soil and with the usual few words, advised -

"Lawn needs scarifying€.  Remember this all began with a weed.

When I came into the house, the door stop had been placed in the centre of the sitting room. This is a serious Lilo thing.  The door stop is a bird, a heavy one with a loop on its head. About once every six months it is placed in a prominent position and seems to be after Lilo has felt 'put out' for some mysterious reason.  It is a statement. It is never chewed. It is just 'Put There'.

I took the duvet to the dry cleaners; the assistant looked as if she wished she had a mask and tongs.  No guarantee the tea stain would come out.

Top soil                                $25.00

Grass seed                          $20.00

Scarifying                             $75.00

Dry Cleaning                       $35.00

Bless the Angel who came in Black. She actually needs a medal as for the past two months she has been learning to live with Benjamin - a new addition - an SPCA special fellow - a cat.  The odd hole and bizarre act can well and truly be forgiven.

Benjamin has been kept secret as I have lived in daily fear of coming home and finding bits of cat in the hall and felt that, apart from total devastation, a blog about that event would not go down too well. To the contrary, the whole experience has been truly heart-warming - next time€¦€¦€¦€¦€¦€¦.from the beginning€¦€¦€¦.

The Greyhound and the Cat

Heather & Lilo

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