The adventures of Wizard and Lucy - It's life as per usual I'm afraid

To start with, Wizard is now officially 8 years old. This has not made him more mature or intelligent as he still runs at breakneck speed through the house, from the lounge to our bedroom and back again while Lucy "hides€ in the kitchen doorway so that she jump out growling and snapping at him, stomping her feet and coaxing him into ever increasing turns of speed. Meanwhile the rest of us are left to leap out of the way and usually end up hanging on the curtains, sitting on the table or spreadeagle against the wall in an effort to take up as little space as possible. This is an almost daily occurrence and it's usually a good sign that Wizard is hungry and that Lucy is a stirrer.

When we first had the pleasure of Lucy moving in with us and forcing us to join the "Cult of Greyhound€ she was nothing more than a thief, albeit a well educated one. I would often come home from work to find that she had stolen a paperweight, toilet roll or shoe and taken it to her bed for the day. On one occasion I came home to find that she had taken the dictionary from the bookshelf and eaten "A€ through to "C€€¦the very next day I got home to find her lying on her bed with Stephen Fry's autobiography open in front of her. Then there was the homework incident.

Our daughter had bought her years school books home, including her art folio and these had been left on the table for inspection at a later time. When we arrived home that day it was to find the lounge full to overflowing with paper, complete with an art folio lying in the middle of the floor. Our daughter went what can only be called "ballistic€ and there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth€¦until we realised that yes, Lucy may have stolen the folio but she had also stolen a box of tissues and shredded that, not the folio€¦so it was all just an elaborate ruse.

Thankfully, when Wizard arrived 2 months later all of the thievery and cunning plans stopped immediately and some sense of stability was imposed on the household. As stable as it can be when you live with Wizard anyway.

Now we have routines that can't be missed or toyed with in any way what so ever. Or so Wizard and Lucy would like to think, but with the arrival of Daylight Saving chaos has ensued again, particularly around previously scheduled events (not that it took them long to get used to having their tea an hour earlier€¦despite what the clock says).

For some reason the changing of the clocks deeply offends both Lucy and Wizard, to the point where they will invent new rituals for us, like getting up at two in the morning and running while leaning against the wall until someone gets out of bed to settle them down again, or trying to get on the bed with us in the middle of the night€¦and then trying to sleep past the pre-ordained "morning walk time€ to the point where I'm sure I'm going to have to poke them with a stick to wake them up.

The other new ritual is for Wizard to wait until I've made our bed in the morning before commandeering it for his own purposes and taking mortal offence with all the pillows, throwing them off the bed in a fit of scratching, scruffing and general unmaking of the bed until it suits his needs. Last week things were taken a bit too far as I arrived home to find that one of the pillows had been what can only be called "torn asunder€ and the stuffing strewn from one side of the room to the other. I will say though that it was extremely thoughtful of whoever the culprit was to have removed the pillowcase first.

As for Lucy, generally speaking she doesn't stop sleeping these days for anything but a walk, food or a toilet break but at this time of year her Discoid Lupus is prone to flaring up. This doesn't mean that we live with a werewolf, but it does mean that her nose gets very sore and her paw pads tend to dry up as well and in patches look almost wart like. After a lot of trial and error (with the error usually involving vomit) we've moved from ointments and creams to enriched Manuka honey which seems to keep the Lupus under control nicely€¦and gives Wizard something to lick off.

As I type this both Wizard and Lucy are involved in their favourite routine, which is sleeping soundly and passing wind silently having been walked and fed for the day. I've also finished with my routine for the day which, as usual, seems to involve a reasonably high amount of picking up after our four legged 'humans'€¦not that we'd have it any other way.